Hannah Elizabeth Dean

Today, I would like to wish a HUGE Happy 21st Birthday to my adopted sister, by paying tribute to her here. I think you'll enjoy this little story.

 

 I met Hannah in church when we were younger, we both attended with our families, and never really spoke a word to each other. We would sit at opposite sides of the hall and glance every now and then, but always too reserved to say anything (apart from one time when she commented that she had the same watch as me. Little did we know that this small observation would be so significant a representation of what our friendship would become). Our family life even resembled one another, we were both the eldest of younger siblings of the same age gap, our mums of the same character, and diversely, our dads also of the same character. We were both the 'good' little Christian example-worthy girls who did well at school, played music (no doubt thanks to musical parents), etc., etc.

 



Being plebs on 'downtime' in Romania

The best part of a decade passed by, always crossing paths, but still never sure whether to approach the other one, and then one day we both (separately) decided to embark on a group trip to Romania. I was then 18, Hannah, 16. We first became friends in the run up to the trip as we did a lot of fundraising together (one of the first out-of-the-ordinary days we ever spent was climbing one of the tallest mountains in the country, no biggie). It is an understatement to say we were on the same journey of self-discovery and growth at that time. That summer of 2010 was when we 'clicked', recounting endless stories from our pasts, and practically squealing when what we were going through in the 'now' was just so ..parallel. And so there it blossomed. I remember sitting on a swing beside her in a park on a sweltering Romanian summer's day, for what felt like hours, just closing my eyes in the occasional warm breeze and thinking 'I've found a true friend' - a statement I don't believe I've ever uttered more sincerely. The 100 hours we spent in a minibus together during that fortnight, never running out of things to gab about, helped confirmed that, too.

 

Since then, we've created some amazing memories, growing & changing into the people we are today, learning so much about the world, ourselves, and the vast expanse of what it means to know love & give love, all the while with never-ending support from the other. We might not go to church with our families (giving the stink eye across the room) anymore... But we do talk 'til the cows come home as we feed our souls. We've learnt not to be afraid to question, we've learnt that it's OK not to have the answers, we've learnt that 'different' is to be embraced, we've learnt that you take love to people, & don't expect them to conform in order to obtain it. We've learnt that what any human anywhere is searching for, at the end of the day, is the freedom to be who they are AND be loved for it. We've learnt that God - in whichever way you comprehend his existence - is all about Grace. And I'm so glad we entertain these thoughts together, because confirmation is such a valuable thing to have in this life.

 

I'm also grateful for the laughs & smiles; tears & hugs; long, edifying, philosophical-talk-filled walks; endless nights of dancing & acting like complete idiots; music (she is such a talented little flower, and if you hear our voices in harmony you may just shed a lil' tear)...

 

Sidenote: Hannah why don't we play music together more often?!

 

We have more in common than two zebras & their stripes. Having the same wristwatch at 11 & 9 years old was nothing.. Right now if you looked in our wardrobes you'd see several identical items, and our tastes in accessories come from the same page of 'The Book of Cool People' (I made that up, don't go looking on Amazon because you won't find anything that tells you how to be as sick as me & Han). Right down to the jewellery or inspirational pages we follow on Instagram.. 'Oh you follow her too? Ah yeah I've read that article! Oh I've seen that video, I loved it as well'. The timely texts we get... Just yesterday I'd been battling with something in my head and then out of the blue she sends me this link to a video that made me feel SO much better about myself. We just know. Y'know?

 

It's funny that once we became inseparable, we found out how both thought that the other didn't like her. We remember as teenagers thinking 'she looks like she hates me'. I never thought she wanted to know me, she never thought I wanted to know her... Turns out we both just have RBF Syndrome. (Yes that's a real thing. Ish.)

 

We've had our (un)fair share of heartache, both in the past and more recently, and I can say with certainty that we've both been an extra sister to each other like God intended for us to be. "Life gets in the way" so they say, but when it counts, we're right by each other's side to put the world to rights. She's never more than a 'life sucks today' text away, or a 'hug me tighter next time you see me', and you can feel it there and then, whether it's from one coast of the country to another, or if we're both about our hometown & we pretty much bump into each other for coffee.

 

I'm very, very proud of you Miss Dean, and have huge hopes & expectations for you. You're so smart, level-headed, funny, kind, empathetic, inspiring... How could you not go as far as far can go.

 

I think we always had an inkling, during those childhood church years of glancing and never really quite connecting. An inkling that there was something wonderful lurking beneath the surface. And today I am very happy indeed to say the hunch was right, and the last few years of truly getting to know you has been nothing short of a PLEASURE. I only see heeeaps more of that to come.

 

 

If a picture says a thousand words... Vennels in Durham, December 2012.

 

 

Love you tons & tons Han, happy 21 years on this earth. <3